Kegan

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Kegan Birbiglia

Kegan or Dat Boi Kegan was a pretty cool guy with some pretty cool memes such as Dat Boi and Its Just A Prank Bro. He's not that cool....

Kegan has tamed a mantis named Raquel. Taught Raquel to sit. Kegan has cool nicknames for his friends like "My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined", as well as "Fjorn Bjorg." Kegan Birbiglia grew up in Malaysia, which is why he’s SO good at climbing. Lmao Kegan resembles a spiral macaroni noodle, a tall blow up man from a car dealership, and a mistake. Haha get powned. Kegan possesses an amazing tolerance for 5-hour energy (aka Gamer Juice) and spends his time throwing Slims Jim’s off of the 6th floor tower. If lost, you can locate Queefen Dickbiglia in the laundry room probably drinking Pepsi like the disgusting Houstonian he is. Only redeeming quality is that he gives really good hugs. Favorite hilarious running bits include:

  • Powned
  • Hit the chug jug
  • Making fun of Blade’s dick size
  • His bee bitmoji
  • Sexing everyone’s moms
  • Gay
  • Ratatouille wet dreams
  • Smegma
  • Unrealistic penis sizes
  • “I still want to go to the dance with you as friends” [THIS ONE WAS GOOD!!! SUPER HUMOROUS! hahahahahha POWNED]
  • Hatred of Lucas
  • Throwing the damn frisbee on the roof. This ones not a bit but it’s so freaking funny
  • Plastic kings cake babies
  • Obsession with The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature

Most fun and interesting quotes:

  • “What’s wrong big schlong?”
  • “It’s a face ... but sideways.” [this was when he was off his balls on 5HE god bless]
  • “I had sex with my dentist.”
  • "Look up the song 'I just had sex with my dog'...it's a great song"
  • “I’m in your room. Pissing on your bed.”

This is all. xoxo el and sadie we adore u RESTORED TO ITS FORMER GLORY AT 5:59 PM